This Book should be Required Reading !!!One of the greatest opportunities I've had in my life recently, was the ninety days of leave that I was given by the Board of Minnedosa United Church to go and reflect on my call to ministry and the issues that had arisen for me in my life and ministry here. Like a caring parental figure, they sent various parties into neutral corners and gave most of us time to catch our breath, take ownership of our lives and deal with our baggage ...
I came back from my leave better able to see some of the big picture issues in my life, and even more able to deal with some of the petty issues. But perhaps most helpful of all, was the laying out a direction for reading, reflection and growth, that included a number of books, and people that I needed to connect with ... It's been a good journey, and it is a journey that is still ongoing ...
A few weeks ago I happened upon the book illustrated above ... it was an amazing read. There was much there to think about, much to reflect upon and much that caused me to pause and say - "I wonder??"
Hare and Babiak both say repeatedly that we should never label other "psychopaths", particularly in work settings. But we should be aware of psychopathic behaviours, and the destruction that co-workers can wreak when they are being deceptive, manipulative and blatantly dis-honest. I found myself reflecting back over my work career and the various jobs I have held, and the various people I've encountered, and wondering if they were exhibiting some psychopathic behaviours ... More than once I was tempted to label some - a psychopath, even against Hare and Babiak's urging ...
The bottom line for me is simply this: This book was incredibly helpful to me as I struggle to understand the "betrayal" of one I had once foolishly called a friend. They were NEVER a friend, and I was never regarded as a friend to them. I was simply one of the pawns that would be the means to an end, and when the end was rendered unattainable, then ... well, it just got ugly. I also realized as I moved through the book, that I played a part and foolishly played along ... Silly me!!
They always say hind sight is 20/20 ... well, after reading this book, I can say that not only is my hind sight 20/20, this book is like a pair of binoculars ... things are much clearer, sharper and more focused than ever before, and I can see the fool that I was ... I can't unwind the clock ... BUT, I can urge others to read this book so that when they encounter people with psychopathic behaviours they'll not only know what do to, they'll be able to keep themselves, their families, their community and their jobs safe ... It was a lesson I learned the hard way ... Oh, to have had this book in the fall of 2004 ...
Oh well ... life rolls on ...
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