Yesterday I sat with my fellow Rotarians as we said farewell to one of our friends and honoured brothers in Rotary ... It was a celebration of wonderful life ...The hardest part of the day for me, aside from having to sit and watch a memorial service, rather than lead it, was having no choice but to rocket out the front door before the tea started. Rather than un the risk of violating the terms of my suspension, I had to flee the building while everyone else had the opportunity to sit and enjoy a light lunch while they shared their stories and celebrated a life. Instead of joining in the fray, I had to content myself with heading home to remember a departed friend on my own ...
Such is my life right now ...
During the service though, as we listening to the grandchildren remember their grandparent and friend in such a personal way, I became mindful of what could be said about me when my life draws to a close ...
More than that, I began to consider the "how" of my eventual demise ... Today as I thought more about the "how" of my ending, I realized that what I fear more than simply being forgotten as life ends, is undergoing a trivial death - you know the one's that turn up in the column for strange and whacky news items ... being forever remembered as "the guy you died by ... " That would be BAD!
If I had my choice I'd like to follow the lead of an old family friend who always said - "I want to die on my 92nd Birthday, the victim of a shooting by a jealous husband ..."
The day before his 92nd Birthday I called him to say farewell ... he laughed and replied - "I don't think it's gonna happen. The women who are interested in an old goat like me don't have husbands who would get jealous, and the women who have husbands aren't interested in someone my age 'cause I have no money to entice them ..."
We laughed ... and a little over two years later he passed away after what he described over the phone moments early as an "absolutely delicious lunch ..." He sat in his easy chair for a nap and never woke up ...
It was a good ending to a good life.
Or, I'd like to go like the man I buried in BC who had just marked his 42nd Birthday with a huge surprise party that included his best friend who he hadn't seen face to face in 20 years. He looked down the table at his life-partner and anounced that "If I died in this moment I would die the happiest I have ever been ..." He then asked who wanted another beer and when he stood up he suffered a massive and deadly heart attack ... and died where he stood ... It was, to describe the words of his best friend, "an exclamation point on a full, albeit short life !"
Life is too fragile and too short ...
We need to drink deeply of life's cup ...
and we need to surround ourselves with kindness, love and care ...
To do otherwise would dishonour our life ... and undermine its meaning and fullness ...
as our Jewish sisters and brothers say so aptly:
L'Chaim !! To life !!
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