Thich Nhat Hanh writes of Anger:
Anger is a zone of energy in us. It is part of us. It is a suffering baby that we have to take care of. The best way to do this is to generate another zone of energy that can embrace and take care of our anger. The second zone of energy is the energy of mindfulness. Mindfulness is the energy of the Buddha. ... You only need to recognize that anger is a negative energy and that mindfulness is a positive one. Then you can use the positive energy energy in order to take care of a negative one.
And of conflict he writes:
Don't blame everything on the other person. Recognize first that the main cause of your suffering is the seed of anger in you, and that the other person is only a secondary cause.
When you begin to understand your role in the conflict, you feel even more relieved. Because you are capable of breathing mindfully, of embracing your anger, and releasing your negative energy you feel much better ...
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